The title is just in case someone here didn't know. But yes, I'm going to China this fall to teach English. I have a feeling anyone who cares knows that, though.
So in my gen chem 2 class, when we first started, Dr. Wieder told all of us that if we didn't do our homework, we were guaranteed to not pass his tests. And if we did do our homework, we weren't guaranteed to pass his tests. When I heard this, I thought "Oh no! I need to start doing my homework!" It's not something he collects, it's just something we do so we know how to do Chemistry.
Well, as it would turn out, my first test in Chem was the same day as my first test in Criminal Justice. Awesome. My criminal justice teacher is pretty cool, I like him a lot, but he doesn't really teach us much. We definitely have to read and study our text book to do well on the test. And the material we covered in chem was something we had covered my first semester, although it definitely wasn't my strong suit (thermodynamics). Since I didn't know anything, really, about criminal justice, I spent a great deal of time studying that and absolutely no time doing Chem homework. It wasn't that I didn't want to do the homework, necessarily. It was just that I needed to study for criminal justice. And that was taking a lot longer than I thought it would.
So the day of my test came closer and closer. I was paying attention in chem and felt like I understood what was going on, but I still hadn't done any homework. So I turned my panic stricken "I need to do homework!" thoughts to more "Challenge Accepted" thoughts. I decided that I would make it my personal mission to pass one of Wieder's tests without doing the homework. Probably not the best idea ever, but it excited me.
The day of my tests, I did my Criminal Justice one and did awesome. So in my hour-and-forty-five-minute break before Chem, I decided to read up on thermodynamics in my text book and study a little before the test. I felt like I had it down comfortably, although I had only been reading and not actually doing any of the example problems in my book. (For the record, doing any of the problems in book doesn't count as doing my Chem homework because I have a different text book than Wieder uses.) It would probably be a good idea to go through a problem on my own to make sure that I could do it, so I reached into my backpack to get out my calculator and--
It's gone. No calculator in my backpack. I must have lost it somewhere. It belongs in THIS backpack. I have a Mon/Wed backpack and a Tues/Thurs backpack, and my calculator belongs in my Mon/Wed backpack because that's the day I have Chemistry. I thought back to the last time I had it. It was in Chem Lab. Did I leave it in the Lab room? No... No I definitely put it back in my backpack... And that was when I realized that my Chem Lab is on Thursday. Which means my calculator belongs in my Tues/Thurs backpack, which makes sense because my math classes are on Tues/Thursday.
So. My calculator is at home. Not only did I not study for my Chem test, but I also left my calculator at home. Looks like I'm going to be doing math by hand. Hopefully there's nothing too crazy...
I took the test, which went alright... Sorta. There were a lot of problems where I'd do all the math for it, get my answer, and the answer I had didn't correlate with any of the options on the test. So I'd go back and try to do it again. Still nothing. (Note to self: It's important to know the density of water.) So I'd give up and just pick an answer. But in general, I felt like I did alright. Everyone says Wieder's tests are impossible because he doesn't ask the question straight out, but it didn't seem that bad to me. Maybe that's because this class is just Gen Chem, and he usually teaches OChem, but the test itself didn't seem all that bad to me. If only I had a calculator...
The next class day, we got our tests back. I got a 69% on mine, which isn't just passing, but it's only 1 point away from getting a C! Not only that, but the class average was like a 62% or something. So, now that I've won the challenge, I can properly prepare for the rest of the tests and get A's on them all. That way, at the end of the semester, Wieder will drop my 69 test and it will be like it never happened.
Oh, and I went through and checked why I got certain questions wrong. For three of the questions, I got partial credit because I made dumb little mistakes that would've been easy to fix if I had read the questions correctly. I forgot to switch one answer from Kelvins to Celsius. I got my endothermic/exothermic terminology mixed up. And I forgot to add in part of the answer in the very last question. Had I gone through and fixed all of those, I would've had a 76% on this test. Oh well. Live and learn.
Feb 15, 2011
Nov 20, 2010
Grimm Fairy Tales
I found a ton of the Brother's Grimm fairy tales online. I like them :) If anyone else is interested in reading some, they're here.
They're pretty short, but there's a lot of them. 210, to be specific.
Oh, and P.S. I got a seasonal job at Target :) I work on the Sales Floor, and it's been a pretty even mixture of working in Electronics and Clothes. And the people there are very nice. $8/hour, and I get a 10% discount. 15% if I get a red card.
They're pretty short, but there's a lot of them. 210, to be specific.
Oh, and P.S. I got a seasonal job at Target :) I work on the Sales Floor, and it's been a pretty even mixture of working in Electronics and Clothes. And the people there are very nice. $8/hour, and I get a 10% discount. 15% if I get a red card.
Nov 12, 2010
This story has a happy ending.
So about 2 or 3 weeks ago, now, I went online and I searched for all the classes I want to take next semester. I was being really prepared and I saw which classes I should take so that the time wouldn't overlap or anything. The classes I wanted were: Intro to the Criminal Justice System, Gen Chem II, Gen Chem Lab, Trig, Freshman English II, and Intro to Stats for Behavioral something (that's a psych class). After I got it all figured out I had a week until I registered for classes, which I mentioned earlier.
Then I learned that I had an Immunization Hold on my account. I went down to the Health Center and asked how I get it removed, and they told me. It was a really simple process, all that I really had to do was get a copy of my immunization records and give it to them.
But I had plenty of time to do that, so no rush. I was mostly worried about not getting certain classes. For instance, I want this one Gen Chem Lab class, and I want this one Gen Chem II class. The Lab teacher is my chem teacher now and he's really good. And Chealomen said that the Gen Chem II teacher was pretty good, so I kept checking the availability on those two classes to make sure I'd still be able to get them. They were getting pretty full, but I was going to be able to register soon, so the chances were still decent that I'd get all the classes I picked out.
So, being busy and a pretty bad procrastinator, I waited until the Monday I could sign up for classes to get that in. But that shouldn't have really been a problem. I had a hold on my account last semester, and it took all of 15 seconds to get cleared. I even turned in the papers a good hour before freshmen were allowed to register, just in case. I went to the Health Center and turned in the papers and the lady at the front desk there looked them over then told me I was good to go.
"Cool. How long until the hold is taken off my account?"
"The hold should be released within 72 hours."
Oh. Wow. 72 hours. That's quite a long time to have to wait. I went and looked at the availability of all my classes again. At that point, the trig class I wanted was full, as was the psych class and my gen chem lab. It was pretty upsetting, but I could probably go through and rearrange everything and get the classes I wanted still, even if I didn't have the specific teacher I wanted for lab. And then I spent the next couple days checking my account every couple hours to see if they released the hold yet. And everytime I saw that they hadn't released my account, I had to check to see if I'd still be able to get my classes.
It was Tuesday morning one time when I checked, right before chem was starting, and I looked at the gen chem labs. All full. Not just Ball's, the one I wanted, but every single one of them. There wasn't even one seat open. And I still couldn't register :( I had no idea what to do. It's kinda important to my major that I get into a lab class, since they're only offered in the spring.
I talked to my teacher and he said that I wasn't alone and that they'll probably open up another class because so many kids need to take it. Then he asked if they were to open up a seat for me in any of the classes, which teacher would I want to have it with? I told him that I was really hoping I could take his class, and he said he'd let me know if a new class or anything opened.
After class was over, I went to check and see if they had released my hold yet. They hadn't. So I checked on the Gen Chem Lab classes instead. They had opened a new class (which was at the same time as the gen chem ii class I wanted) and added 6 additional student to each existing class. I was so excited because I would be able to take the chem lab with Ball if they released my account soon enough. So I kept checking in on that.
Later that night, Ball emailed me to let me know that the opened a new class and had a few more students in his class. He said that he can't override my immunization hold, but he'll try to hang on to a seat in his class for me as long as he could. I kept checking in on his class and it was filling up pretty slowly, so that by Wednesday (I still had 24 hour to wait for my account to be released) there was only 1 seat yet.
Now, I'm getting really really anxious. It would make my semester so much easier if I could just get this class, and there's only one seat left. I decided that rather than wait the 24 hours, I would just go to the Health Center and ask them to clear my hold for me. So I went and talked to a different girl than I had talked to before.
"There's a hold on my account, I was just wondering if you could get it taken off for me."
"Did you turn in your paperwork?"
"Yes, I did."
"When?" Oh dear. I'm going to tell her, and she's going to tell me I have to wait another day and then come back if it's not released yet.
"On Monday." Wait for it.
"Oh, it should already be released." Well that was a pleasant surprise. She took my ID number and said she'd give it to her supervisor and get my account released by 5 pm. It was already 4 pm. :)
Then, as I was leaving campus, some guy stopped me and asked if I had a minute to talk. He was with a guy who had a camera. I said sure and he got my name, then showed me some pictures of dead people, or grave yards, or smoker's lungs that they're trying to push to be on cigarette boxes, and he asked if I thought they would be effective for teens and people in their 20's. I said no, because the smoker's don't really think that kinda thing will happen to them, or if they do think it'll happen to them, they don't care because that's pretty far ahead in the future, so no need to worry now. It was weird, but he got what he needed and let me go on my way.
I went home and signed up for classes. I got into Ball's class, and also the other chem class I wanted. My original schedule plan had me going to school every Mon Wed and Thurs from 9:30 to 3:50, and Tues from 9:30 to 10:45. My actual schedule has all the same classes, but instead on Mon and Wed I go from 9:30 to 3:50, on Tues I go 5:00 to 7:45, and on Thurs I go from 12:00 to 7:45. And I've got a break for lunch/ dinner Mon, Wed and Thurs. It'll be cool :)
And, if you were wondering what the little smoker interview has to do with anything, it was apparently a part of a thing they were doing for the Today Show. Guess who was on National TV? :D Although, they don't mention my name so I don't know why he asked, but it was still cool ha. I didn't even know this was for something real, I thought maybe it was for a class. But then my friend told me she saw me on TV. Sweet! If you want to see the clip, it's on my facebook. :)
For such a stressful week, it sure made for a happy ending.
Then I learned that I had an Immunization Hold on my account. I went down to the Health Center and asked how I get it removed, and they told me. It was a really simple process, all that I really had to do was get a copy of my immunization records and give it to them.
But I had plenty of time to do that, so no rush. I was mostly worried about not getting certain classes. For instance, I want this one Gen Chem Lab class, and I want this one Gen Chem II class. The Lab teacher is my chem teacher now and he's really good. And Chealomen said that the Gen Chem II teacher was pretty good, so I kept checking the availability on those two classes to make sure I'd still be able to get them. They were getting pretty full, but I was going to be able to register soon, so the chances were still decent that I'd get all the classes I picked out.
So, being busy and a pretty bad procrastinator, I waited until the Monday I could sign up for classes to get that in. But that shouldn't have really been a problem. I had a hold on my account last semester, and it took all of 15 seconds to get cleared. I even turned in the papers a good hour before freshmen were allowed to register, just in case. I went to the Health Center and turned in the papers and the lady at the front desk there looked them over then told me I was good to go.
"Cool. How long until the hold is taken off my account?"
"The hold should be released within 72 hours."
Oh. Wow. 72 hours. That's quite a long time to have to wait. I went and looked at the availability of all my classes again. At that point, the trig class I wanted was full, as was the psych class and my gen chem lab. It was pretty upsetting, but I could probably go through and rearrange everything and get the classes I wanted still, even if I didn't have the specific teacher I wanted for lab. And then I spent the next couple days checking my account every couple hours to see if they released the hold yet. And everytime I saw that they hadn't released my account, I had to check to see if I'd still be able to get my classes.
It was Tuesday morning one time when I checked, right before chem was starting, and I looked at the gen chem labs. All full. Not just Ball's, the one I wanted, but every single one of them. There wasn't even one seat open. And I still couldn't register :( I had no idea what to do. It's kinda important to my major that I get into a lab class, since they're only offered in the spring.
I talked to my teacher and he said that I wasn't alone and that they'll probably open up another class because so many kids need to take it. Then he asked if they were to open up a seat for me in any of the classes, which teacher would I want to have it with? I told him that I was really hoping I could take his class, and he said he'd let me know if a new class or anything opened.
After class was over, I went to check and see if they had released my hold yet. They hadn't. So I checked on the Gen Chem Lab classes instead. They had opened a new class (which was at the same time as the gen chem ii class I wanted) and added 6 additional student to each existing class. I was so excited because I would be able to take the chem lab with Ball if they released my account soon enough. So I kept checking in on that.
Later that night, Ball emailed me to let me know that the opened a new class and had a few more students in his class. He said that he can't override my immunization hold, but he'll try to hang on to a seat in his class for me as long as he could. I kept checking in on his class and it was filling up pretty slowly, so that by Wednesday (I still had 24 hour to wait for my account to be released) there was only 1 seat yet.
Now, I'm getting really really anxious. It would make my semester so much easier if I could just get this class, and there's only one seat left. I decided that rather than wait the 24 hours, I would just go to the Health Center and ask them to clear my hold for me. So I went and talked to a different girl than I had talked to before.
"There's a hold on my account, I was just wondering if you could get it taken off for me."
"Did you turn in your paperwork?"
"Yes, I did."
"When?" Oh dear. I'm going to tell her, and she's going to tell me I have to wait another day and then come back if it's not released yet.
"On Monday." Wait for it.
"Oh, it should already be released." Well that was a pleasant surprise. She took my ID number and said she'd give it to her supervisor and get my account released by 5 pm. It was already 4 pm. :)
Then, as I was leaving campus, some guy stopped me and asked if I had a minute to talk. He was with a guy who had a camera. I said sure and he got my name, then showed me some pictures of dead people, or grave yards, or smoker's lungs that they're trying to push to be on cigarette boxes, and he asked if I thought they would be effective for teens and people in their 20's. I said no, because the smoker's don't really think that kinda thing will happen to them, or if they do think it'll happen to them, they don't care because that's pretty far ahead in the future, so no need to worry now. It was weird, but he got what he needed and let me go on my way.
I went home and signed up for classes. I got into Ball's class, and also the other chem class I wanted. My original schedule plan had me going to school every Mon Wed and Thurs from 9:30 to 3:50, and Tues from 9:30 to 10:45. My actual schedule has all the same classes, but instead on Mon and Wed I go from 9:30 to 3:50, on Tues I go 5:00 to 7:45, and on Thurs I go from 12:00 to 7:45. And I've got a break for lunch/ dinner Mon, Wed and Thurs. It'll be cool :)
And, if you were wondering what the little smoker interview has to do with anything, it was apparently a part of a thing they were doing for the Today Show. Guess who was on National TV? :D Although, they don't mention my name so I don't know why he asked, but it was still cool ha. I didn't even know this was for something real, I thought maybe it was for a class. But then my friend told me she saw me on TV. Sweet! If you want to see the clip, it's on my facebook. :)
For such a stressful week, it sure made for a happy ending.
Oct 31, 2010
I rock.
Guess how much I rock.
I rock so much, that my grade in algebra up to this point in the semester is a 99.13% with only like 5 more weeks of class.
**Mom and Dad, look away**
(I'm missing the .87 percent because I don't always do all the homework since that only counts for 10% of our total grade and it's SO EASY.)
**Mom and Dad may join us again.**
So, I rock. College is easy haha. At least, math is easy.
Next semester I'm taking 18 credits. I already have my schedule all laid out, and it doesn't look too bad. Assuming the classes don't all fill up in the week I can't register and everyone else can, I'll go from 9:30-2:45 on Mon, Wed and Thursdays. On Tuesdays I'll only have trig from 9:30-10:45, but then I can take the rest of the time to study in the library or something. (HA.)
And, I'm going to start babysitting for the demon children again, but only for 2 1/2 hours in the morning from 5:00-7:30ish, most of which they'll be asleep for, and only 3 or 4 times a week. Shannon said she'd give me 15 per day, which is awesome. :)
Man. Life rocks.
I rock so much, that my grade in algebra up to this point in the semester is a 99.13% with only like 5 more weeks of class.
**Mom and Dad, look away**
(I'm missing the .87 percent because I don't always do all the homework since that only counts for 10% of our total grade and it's SO EASY.)
**Mom and Dad may join us again.**
So, I rock. College is easy haha. At least, math is easy.
Next semester I'm taking 18 credits. I already have my schedule all laid out, and it doesn't look too bad. Assuming the classes don't all fill up in the week I can't register and everyone else can, I'll go from 9:30-2:45 on Mon, Wed and Thursdays. On Tuesdays I'll only have trig from 9:30-10:45, but then I can take the rest of the time to study in the library or something. (HA.)
And, I'm going to start babysitting for the demon children again, but only for 2 1/2 hours in the morning from 5:00-7:30ish, most of which they'll be asleep for, and only 3 or 4 times a week. Shannon said she'd give me 15 per day, which is awesome. :)
Man. Life rocks.
Oct 4, 2010
To Understand Confusion
I wrote this paper for my English class this year. It's the 2nd one that was due. I was going to have someone read it, but he got busy and couldn't get back to me in time. Instead, I asked Sara to read it and she liked it a lot. I was just curious what everyone else thought of it :) The prompt was to describe a concept that you've learned recently. I actually took "recently" to mean within the past 6 or 7 years, but whatever! It's a good concept! Haha. Enjoy!
Have you ever noticed how awful everyone is? I mean, think about it. They’re all dumb in everything they do. They try to sing along to songs they don’t know, which is just annoying. They’re all hopelessly slow when they drive, consistently making everyone who happens to be stuck behind them late. They’re inconsiderate and selfish, not taking two seconds to hold a door open and instead letting it slam in people’s faces. And worst of all, they think they’re perfect and they make snap judgments about others without even knowing them. Everyone is just a horrible person, to put it simply. There are a few exceptions: my family, my friends and me. We might do dumb or rude things sometimes, but at least we notice and then try to correct it in the future, unlike the rest of the earth’s people. For them, hope is lost.
I was at my peak of hatred for people in general when I took a leadership training course, and the instructor was a curious case. He was not rude or judgmental like the rest of the world. His name was Josh and he was young, maybe 26 or 27. He had light brown hair, and he was not particularly skinny, but he was understanding and kind. Without ever having met me before, he knew that I had been through experiences in my life that shaped me and made me who I am. He knew that my actions didn’t always necessarily reflect my personality, and that sometimes I offended others, but I never meant to.
That was the key: he understood and wasn't judgmental. He knew all 30 or so of us were good people, and that we didn't go through life trying to offend others. It piqued my curiosity and I just wanted to know how he could understand all of us without having met any of us before. So he explained.
It was only a few years earlier. Josh was in New York. He was on the subway one particular, but ordinary, day. The subway wasn't overly crowded, but there were a decent amount of people there, all silent, as usual. Many were staring off into space, like Josh was, just using the time to catch up with their thoughts. A few people read newspapers or finished their novels. It was quiet with proper subway etiquette being displayed by everyone, until they reached one specific stop.
A man-- let's call him Frank-- got on the subway with his three young children. Frank took a seat just two away from Josh. Then he leaned back in the seat and closed his eyes. Meanwhile, his children ran wild. They raced screaming up and down the isles. They climbed the handrails and empty seats like a jungle gym. They displayed absolutely no respect to the rest of the people. The monsters ran around disturbing the passengers. Everybody was ripped and dragged from their quiet solitude, forced to be present in a subway cart that seemed like Hell. The tranquility that had previously existed in this cart vanished. Instead, wild animals replaced it. And their dad just laid there! He dared to get onto a busy subway with such demons, and he lacked the decency to try to keep them in line for the rest of the passengers.
It was ridiculous. Josh was fed up with it, and he was in a convenient position to let Frank know exactly what he thought. He bitterly looked at Frank, oblivious and self-centered, and almost chewed him out for letting his children terrorize all the innocent victims on the subway. That was when Josh realized it. Frank was completely oblivious to everything. He didn't even realize that his kids were running around, let alone that they were angering the other people. Something seemed amiss. Josh took a deep breath and instead of yelling at Frank, he simpling and calmly said, "Sir, excuse me, but do you need help with your children?"
The man looked around, almost woken from a trance, and saw his children going postal and the contempt of all the others on the subway. He just sighed and replied, "Oh I'm really sorry. We're just heading home from the hospital. My wife just died, and I guess I'm having a hard time dealing with it."
Everyone's faces instantly melted with compassion for this poor man who they had misjudged. He was not a bad father or a bad human being, he was just in pain. They all had read him wrong. They didn't know what his situation was, and they judged him anyway. It hit Josh like a brick wall. You can't look at someone else and tell what's going on in their life, thus invalidating any judgment you might make about that person.
For some reason, the story hit home to me. I do dumb things all the time, and I constantly worry that other people are judging me for doing them. I once stopped at a green light. I was lost in an unfamiliar part of the state, and there was snow on the ground. As I came up to the light, I couldn't see where the line was to stop, so I sat there worrying about where I should stop and if I would be too far into the intersection. I was so preoccupied with focusing on where I should be stopped, that I didn't even realize that the light wasn't red. The lane next to me was open, thankfully, so when someone stopped behind me, they couldn't have been too mad, or else they would've gone around.
Now, were the situation reversed, I would have been pissed off at whoever was stopped at the green light. I'd yell at them, from the privacy of my own car, to stop being such an idiot and to get going. I wouldn't even consider that they were lost or confused about where the line was. I wouldn't think that maybe they weren't from that part of Denver. I would just be angry. That's probably why I'm so afraid someone else is angrily judging me when I do something stupid: because I would if I were them. After Josh told his story, it made it easier to realize that people are often very hard to read, and I often don't see the whole picture. I don't have the right to judge someone else since I don't know their story, and I will probably be wrong if I try to guess.
So now, when I come upon someone who seems to be a few fries short of a Happy Meal, all I really need to do is remember that I don't know them. Whatever they're doing on the surface doesn't even begin to show the complexity of their motivation for their actions. By incorporating this into my life, I find that I don't feel so judged when I do dumb things. I notice the people that aren't judging me more, and I feel more comfortable with myself.
That, in and of itself, is its own reward. However, it doesn't end there. My happier disposition will put others in a better mood, and their better mood will have a positive effect on the people they know. It creates a giant positive cycle, so that one person can affect everyone else. Knowing that you can have such a profound effect on all the people you know and come in contact with, would you make the effort to try to understand that others are just lost and confused, leading them to do something "stupid," or would you dare to judge them from just one glimpse?
Have you ever noticed how awful everyone is? I mean, think about it. They’re all dumb in everything they do. They try to sing along to songs they don’t know, which is just annoying. They’re all hopelessly slow when they drive, consistently making everyone who happens to be stuck behind them late. They’re inconsiderate and selfish, not taking two seconds to hold a door open and instead letting it slam in people’s faces. And worst of all, they think they’re perfect and they make snap judgments about others without even knowing them. Everyone is just a horrible person, to put it simply. There are a few exceptions: my family, my friends and me. We might do dumb or rude things sometimes, but at least we notice and then try to correct it in the future, unlike the rest of the earth’s people. For them, hope is lost.
I was at my peak of hatred for people in general when I took a leadership training course, and the instructor was a curious case. He was not rude or judgmental like the rest of the world. His name was Josh and he was young, maybe 26 or 27. He had light brown hair, and he was not particularly skinny, but he was understanding and kind. Without ever having met me before, he knew that I had been through experiences in my life that shaped me and made me who I am. He knew that my actions didn’t always necessarily reflect my personality, and that sometimes I offended others, but I never meant to.
That was the key: he understood and wasn't judgmental. He knew all 30 or so of us were good people, and that we didn't go through life trying to offend others. It piqued my curiosity and I just wanted to know how he could understand all of us without having met any of us before. So he explained.
It was only a few years earlier. Josh was in New York. He was on the subway one particular, but ordinary, day. The subway wasn't overly crowded, but there were a decent amount of people there, all silent, as usual. Many were staring off into space, like Josh was, just using the time to catch up with their thoughts. A few people read newspapers or finished their novels. It was quiet with proper subway etiquette being displayed by everyone, until they reached one specific stop.
A man-- let's call him Frank-- got on the subway with his three young children. Frank took a seat just two away from Josh. Then he leaned back in the seat and closed his eyes. Meanwhile, his children ran wild. They raced screaming up and down the isles. They climbed the handrails and empty seats like a jungle gym. They displayed absolutely no respect to the rest of the people. The monsters ran around disturbing the passengers. Everybody was ripped and dragged from their quiet solitude, forced to be present in a subway cart that seemed like Hell. The tranquility that had previously existed in this cart vanished. Instead, wild animals replaced it. And their dad just laid there! He dared to get onto a busy subway with such demons, and he lacked the decency to try to keep them in line for the rest of the passengers.
It was ridiculous. Josh was fed up with it, and he was in a convenient position to let Frank know exactly what he thought. He bitterly looked at Frank, oblivious and self-centered, and almost chewed him out for letting his children terrorize all the innocent victims on the subway. That was when Josh realized it. Frank was completely oblivious to everything. He didn't even realize that his kids were running around, let alone that they were angering the other people. Something seemed amiss. Josh took a deep breath and instead of yelling at Frank, he simpling and calmly said, "Sir, excuse me, but do you need help with your children?"
The man looked around, almost woken from a trance, and saw his children going postal and the contempt of all the others on the subway. He just sighed and replied, "Oh I'm really sorry. We're just heading home from the hospital. My wife just died, and I guess I'm having a hard time dealing with it."
Everyone's faces instantly melted with compassion for this poor man who they had misjudged. He was not a bad father or a bad human being, he was just in pain. They all had read him wrong. They didn't know what his situation was, and they judged him anyway. It hit Josh like a brick wall. You can't look at someone else and tell what's going on in their life, thus invalidating any judgment you might make about that person.
For some reason, the story hit home to me. I do dumb things all the time, and I constantly worry that other people are judging me for doing them. I once stopped at a green light. I was lost in an unfamiliar part of the state, and there was snow on the ground. As I came up to the light, I couldn't see where the line was to stop, so I sat there worrying about where I should stop and if I would be too far into the intersection. I was so preoccupied with focusing on where I should be stopped, that I didn't even realize that the light wasn't red. The lane next to me was open, thankfully, so when someone stopped behind me, they couldn't have been too mad, or else they would've gone around.
Now, were the situation reversed, I would have been pissed off at whoever was stopped at the green light. I'd yell at them, from the privacy of my own car, to stop being such an idiot and to get going. I wouldn't even consider that they were lost or confused about where the line was. I wouldn't think that maybe they weren't from that part of Denver. I would just be angry. That's probably why I'm so afraid someone else is angrily judging me when I do something stupid: because I would if I were them. After Josh told his story, it made it easier to realize that people are often very hard to read, and I often don't see the whole picture. I don't have the right to judge someone else since I don't know their story, and I will probably be wrong if I try to guess.
So now, when I come upon someone who seems to be a few fries short of a Happy Meal, all I really need to do is remember that I don't know them. Whatever they're doing on the surface doesn't even begin to show the complexity of their motivation for their actions. By incorporating this into my life, I find that I don't feel so judged when I do dumb things. I notice the people that aren't judging me more, and I feel more comfortable with myself.
That, in and of itself, is its own reward. However, it doesn't end there. My happier disposition will put others in a better mood, and their better mood will have a positive effect on the people they know. It creates a giant positive cycle, so that one person can affect everyone else. Knowing that you can have such a profound effect on all the people you know and come in contact with, would you make the effort to try to understand that others are just lost and confused, leading them to do something "stupid," or would you dare to judge them from just one glimpse?
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)